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Posts Tagged ‘Katy Perry’

I Love The Internet (pt. 28)

November 28, 2010 1 comment

….aaaaannndd we’re back. Apparently while I was gone, Sheek Louch turned into a were-gorilla. Someone get this man a shiny suit immediately!

– So my friend was telling me about her quest to get a good Halloween costume, and she tells me that she saw a cute steampunk outfit, but didn’t get it because she “doesn’t agree with people who hate steam.” While the concept of alienated teenagers raging against a watery autocracy is pretty amusing, this Warren Ellis-inspired gallery of Steampunk Batmen is damn cool in its own right. Oh, and speaking of steampunk

– OH SHIT IT’S A NEW GIRL TALK ALBUM EVERYBODY SAY FUCK YEAH

– I desperately need more Hillary Fisher in my life.

– Oh, those wacky Russians. If this isn’t some sort of avant-garde Internet prank, this is one of the greatest things I’ve ever heard of.

– Well thank you very much, Rhys Cooper, for turning my entire 80’s-fueled youth into a GIGANTIC NIGHTMARE.

Miracle fruit, eh? What’s the over/under on how long it took before a couple took them and got down on a 69? A day? An hour?

Katy Perry Cleavage Bomb! You’re welcome, by the way…

– So apparently there are 8% more women than men in Latvia, and combined with a culture that encourages machismo (including heavy drinking and smoking, which leads to a ton of male deaths), Latvian women are finding themselves having to go abroad to find suitable men. On a separate note, Latvian women are apparently known for their unique beauty, former Playboy Playmate Igna Drozdova being among their number. Just sayin’…

– Well, this certainly puts Sixteen Stone in a whole new light

– Oh my God look at this GIANT KIT-KAT.

– Hey, you’d be smiling too.

– Let Christmas begin!!!

– So I don’t normally go for girls who seem like they probably spend way more time in the gym than I do, but…

Damn, Prudence Moe is for fucking real.

– Hey, it’s Jeju Loveland! An oldie but a goodie.

Deep-Fried Bacon Wrapped Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. The End – Game Over.

– I almost, almost, wish this type of thing would happen in America, just to see how many FNC “journalists'” heads would explode.

– This is Victoria Givens. Victoria is famous for holding a world record. And just what is that world record, you ask? Why, she took it up the ass from 101 men in 7 hours. Presumably, this is a “before” shot.

– This just in: Greg Rucka is the fucking man.

– Rule 34 strikes Southpark. And I don’t know who Laurie B. is, but I dig her stuff.

– I’ll be impressed when this is offered in a “personalized” form.

– I never really got into “The Hard Times of RJ Berger”, but JESUS Amber Lancaster is gorgeous.

Foreign commercials are awesome.

– Look, everyone – it’s a real-life Charizard!

– There is literally no corner of this home that has not had people fucking in it. NONE.

– Tim Curry as the ┬áJoker? Sidney Poitier, Bruce Lee & Pam Grier in The Matrix? Pure awesomeness.

– So I recently wrote a post making great mention of hot female sportscasters. I seriously fucked up by not mentioning Melanie Collins.

– Alice makes for a pretty decent bottom bitch:

– Why am I just now finding out that Mila Kunis and Zoe Saldana were in a movie where they played two college roommates in a “friends with benefits” relationship?

– When I was a kid, Skeletor was terrifying. Now that I’m older, he just sounds like a whiny old jerk:

– Look, when Hunter S. Thompson tells you he wants you to come out to his farm, get drunk and shoot guns, you don’t ask questions. You just go.

I Love The Internet (pt. 24)

July 18, 2010 2 comments

– When most people think of the future, they either see a nightmarish hell-on-earth or a hollow utopia. For those firmly ensconced in the “Mad Max” camp, this quiz should help you decide whether you want to stock up on gas and oil, or start boning up on your Ayn Rand.

– When you’re living on the streets, with no real prospects, and you’re not sure when and where your next meal is coming from, you know what you do? You start sharking bitches. Godspeed, you crazy hobo. (P.S. – I’m fully aware that this has the scent of a set-up scene. I don’t care.)

– This is so ridiculously on-point that it’s almost not even funny…almost.

– Damnit, I’m in the wrong business.

– Sometimes, when a guy’s having a bad day and nothing seems to go right, he just says, “Fuck it – I wanna see some sweet tits bouncing around.” For days like that, there’s the fantastically named Tits That Jiggle A Bit.

– Man, Snoop Dogg had to have been high when he came up with this idea. Renting an entire country for a music video? You really couldn’t come up with a better way to spend that money? Also, my favorite part of the article: “Local property lease agent Karl Schwaerzler admitted:” ‘It would have been possible.’ But the deal fell through because Snoop’s management ‘did not give us enough time’.” Unbelievable.

– Fuck you, Ryanair; fuck you in your cheap, dirty asses. Odds are I was never going to use your airline anyway, seeing as how you operate out of Australia, and I’m glad for that because I hope this new slush pile of watery shit you have the gall to call an “idea” sends your company into a tailspin. Vertical seating? Seriously? How about you do everyone a favor and call it what it is – standing-room only ticketing on your planes. Fuck you, Ryanair, and fuck any US airlines that are stupid enough to think this could actually work.

– Hey, if you’re gonna be famous, there’s worse things to be known for…

– Charts: making things more easily understandable for nerds (and less understandable for everyone else) since who-the-fuck knows when?

– You know what says classy? A 10-inch fine art statue of everyone’s favorite Merc With a Mouth, Deadpool!

– Giving new meaning to “Space Jam“.

– Pushing your boundaries = good. Doing it in the laziest way possible = not so good, aka “as stereotypically American as possible.”

– “Yeah, so, um…I don’t really feel like smoking anymore…”

– You know who’s still really, REALLY hot? Jennifer Love Hewitt.

– Yeah, it looks delicious, but it’s made in Japan so I’ll bet you $20 it ends up in a really freaky AV scene by year’s end. AV is a Japanese term for porno, in case you haven’t guessed that yet.

– Just imagine this is Gargamel’s girlfriend, and suddenly the entire Smurfs universe makes a lot more sense. Not a lot of sense overall, obviously. But a lot more sense.

– Because God loves Englishmen, obviously. Not enough to let them get even close to winning the World Cup, but still, I’m sure the love’s there.

– It’s never a good thing when your reach exceeds your grasp.

WARNING: Contained on this web-page is nearly every horrific meme that’s scarred the consciousness of the unwary interwebs traveler for the last few years. Enter, and be warned – what is seen, cannot be unseen…

– The only way, the ONLY WAY this picture could be anymore awesome is if it was taken during the filming of Broken Lizard’s needs-to-get-made, sure-to-be-cult-classic “Potfest”.

– I live in Orlando, better known across the world as “that shitty tourist trap next to where Mickey Mouse lives.” As such, I have been to WDW so many times that I literally cannot the stand the site of the place. However, if the many women who walk around the park pretending to be various animated princess were to dress similarly to these J. Scott Campbell drawings, I might be inclined to stop by. Oh, and if there’s anyone interested, someone did something similar with the Disney dudes, but…yeah.

– Hey, check it out – 4Chan was actually good for something besides horribleness, for all of…less than five minutes. Good work, 4Chan!

This comic needs to be framed and hung in the working area of anyone who claims to be an “artist”.

– Good Lord; Jessica Lucas, Evangeline Lilly, Kristin Kreuk, Grace Park…who knew the Great White North was throwing heat like that? That’s a murderer’s row even without Emmanuelle Chriqui! (Yes, I know it’s a slideshow; you’ll survive.)

VENOM NOM NOM NOM

– No lie: while it wasn’t totally surprising, this was the most depressing shit I heard all week.

– I’d never heard of this Zackary Canepari guy before, but these pictures from a Realdoll manufacturing plant are amazing, and damn provoking to boot.

– There’s no way I can sum up the mind-blowing nature of the Federation of Damanhur, so do yourself a favor and just check it out.

– OK, this…this one cut a little deep.

– OK, someone really needs to explain what the fuck is going on at Denver International Airport. Like, now.

– Brilliant; absolutely brilliant:

– Thank you, Classy Hands, for revealing the hidden truth behind an 80’s teen classic:

– How’s about one more! Maybe, say…Dania Ramirez frolicking on a beach and looking all sexyfied? Could that be something you’d be interested in?

– OK, this is the last one. Hat tip to the good folks at FADER; here’s “Curls” by Girls. Perfect summer music: